SO I CALLED JESUS UP

SO I AM TRYING TO HAVE SEX WITH THIS IDIOT PUTIN, BE CLOSE TO HIM, SENDING HIM SUGGESTIVE LETTERS AND HE IS HANGING AROUND NECK OF MERKEL RUNNING OFF TO SEE MERKEL. I OPENED A PORTAL TO UNDERWORLD AND CALLED JESUS UP. I JUST KNOW HOW TO DO SOME WEIRD STUFF LIKE OPEN PORTALS - WHEN ZEUS CAME TO GIVE ME LIGHTENING RODS - I NODDED WHEN I SAW HIM LIKE I WAS EXPEXTING HIM TO GIVE ME RODS. I WENT ROUND A TINY CIRCLE ON FLOOR OF MY ROOM LOOKING DOWN (ALMOST BENT DOWN) SAYING 'I AM WORRIED, I AM WORRIED' - SUDDENLY LIKE A HEADLIGHT OPENED AT MY FEET - WEIRD LIGHT - AND I WAS TALKING TO JESUS. I SAID ' I AM VERY WORRIED I NEED YOU UP HERE'. LIKE 10 MINUTES LATER MICHAEL SAID OPEN THE LAPTOP - I OPENED PICTURE OF CHRIST THE SAVIOUR CATHEDRAL IN MOSCOW - I SAW A LIGHT MOVE ACROSS THE ROOM AND IT WENT INTO SUPPER PICTURE - HALO AROUND HEAD OF JESUS BECAME VERY BRIGHT. THAN JESUS BENT FORWARD AND POINTED TO PATRIARCH KIRILL AND SAID 'TELL HIM I AM HERE'. I SAID OK. I CAN STILL SEE JESUS THROUGH PAINTING. JESUS IS MY TWIN BROTHER ALSO GOD OF UNDERWORLD. HE CAN STOP ANY ATTACK COMING FROM DEVILS THROUGH MERKEL OVER ME. ALSO HE CAN STOP ANY ENERGY TRANSFER FROM ME TO MERKEL AS PUTIN WS TREATING AS IF MERKEL IS ME. I REALLY FELT VERY SAFE AFTER THAT AND TOTALLY IGNORED ANYTHING GOING ON BETWEEN PUTIN AND MERKEL.